Monday, October 8, 2012

Scattered thoughts, Columbus, Death, and Arizona

First of all, happy Columbus Day -- or Happy F*** the Indians Day, whichever you prefer. We should not celebrate this as a national holiday.  Maybe a day of mourning????

Back in Arizona with the radical right wing crazies and the preppers.  I love it here, though.  I love the desert, the rocks and the mountains.  I don't care who lives here -- I am tolerant of everyone.  The only person I am probably not tolerant of is myself.

Once again, I am dissatisfied with myself.  I have 30 things I want to do --- okay maybe that is an exaggeration -- probably 10 or 12 --and I can't even focus to get to one of them.  I have to narrow this list down so that I am not spreading myself so thin.  But with age catching up to me, I always think, wow it's now or never -- and I realize I may never get to do all of the things I want.

Since I quit believing in the afterlife, death hasn't scared me.  And it still doesn't.  What scares me is not being able to finish everything I want to do.  Am I selfish to think I should get to do these things? I still want to learn, to teach and to use my hands to create.  I wish I had studied art.

How old was Grandma Moses when she started painting?


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